Critique My Query

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A romantic suspense novel

An evaluation of an agent query letter

By Marla Miller
Published: December 6, 2010
Marla Miller
Marla Miller
The query letter

Dear ________:

I am seeking representation for Book Title, a completed 72,000-word romantic suspense novel set in Minnesota.
 
On her 18th birthday, Cassandra thought she had been able to escape from a childhood of abuse. She thought she had found the “perfect” husband. But soon after the birth of their twins, she begins to see another side of him that he’d been hiding, even from their closest friends and family.
 
Surviving a turbulent marriage that almost kills her, Cassandra is finally convinced to file for divorce. She takes the twins and heads deep into the woods, to a cabin where no one will find them. Little does she know that they are being followed.
 
In 2009 I graduated from the Blank Writing School; Book Title is a recipient of the 2010 Editor’s Choice Award from Blank.com. I use the pen name of Pen Name.
 
Thank you for your time and consideration. I look forward to the opportunity to share the entire manuscript with you.

Sincerely,

[Name withheld]

The critique


Want Marla to critique your agent query letter?

Send your letter to marketingthemuse@gmail.com. Be sure to use the subject line "The Writer Query Letter Critique." Queries for nonfiction and fiction (all genres) are welcome, and critiques are free.

Marla Miller, a writer herself, teaches Marketing the Muse Workshops at the Southern California Writers' Conference and the Santa Barbara Writers Conference. Her Quick Query Critique video segments are available at www.marlamiller.com.
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LEEANNE BORKA said:
I did have it carried out more, telling about the suspense, but I had several professionals tell me that it was too long, it was two pages and they like the query letter to be one page.
4 stars
DAVID LINHARDT from NORTH CAROLINA said:
I believe this continuing series of articles will be helpful to the writers (including myself) who struggle with composing a query letter which will capture an agent's or an editor's interest. I will continue to view future video's and I will submit a query letter for comment.

Good idea!
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